Who Can Weigh a Heart?
Parashat Vayera, Genesis 18:1–22:24
Chaim Dauermann, Simchat Yisrael, West Haven, CT
I’ve worked in the restaurant business for over fifteen years, and over that time have accumulated more than my share of interesting stories.
One night I was working as the host at my workplace. I greeted two women at the door, welcomed them inside, and got them seated comfortably before returning to my post. Unbeknownst to me, based on how I was dressed, and my formal way of speaking, they jumped to some conclusions about my attitude. They told their server that I thought they couldn’t afford to eat and drink at our establishment, and they were quite offended as a result. This wasn’t at all accurate—I’d said and felt no such thing—but they were certain it was true, and soon became convinced that other members of the staff felt hostile toward them as well. Their evening soon became unsalvageable. We had treated them with the same warmth and courtesy that we extended to everyone, but they left our establishment feeling livid.
Many of us have experienced times when uncharitable presumptions have led one person to misunderstand the intentions of another. Such situations are often harmless, but sometimes the stakes can be quite high, and the resultant misunderstanding can have lasting consequences. What happens when our wrong presumption is about the condition of a person’s heart? What happens when, in the process of making such assumptions, we lose sight of the very sovereignty of God? This is a situation we read about in Parashat Vayera.
Ever on the move, Abraham finds himself living in Gerar, a Philistine city in the Negev, under the rule of King Abimelech. The Philistines were polytheists, a fact not lost on Abraham, who, having sojourned in Canaan since God called him out of Haran, was wise to the local cultures and customs. Abraham was also what we today call street-smart. Aware of his own wealth and his wife’s beauty, he worried someone might kill him and take Sarah as his own. So he’d devised a safety tactic for him and Sarah wherever they sojourned: They agreed to pass themselves off as brother and sister, rather than husband and wife.
King Abimelech takes notice of Sarah, and has her brought to him. But then God intervenes, appearing to Abimelech in a dream: “Behold, you are a dead man because of the woman whom you have taken, for she is a man’s wife” (Gen 20:3). Abimelech pleads his case before God, asking for leniency because he did not know Sarah’s status when he had sent for her.
Then God said to him in the dream, “Yes, I know that you have done this in the integrity of your heart, and it was I who kept you from sinning against me. Therefore I did not let you touch her. Now then, return the man’s wife, for he is a prophet, so that he will pray for you, and you shall live. But if you do not return her, know that you shall surely die, you and all who are yours.” (Gen 20:6–7)
Terrified for his life and the lives of his people, Abimelech angrily confronts Abraham about his deception, demanding, “What did you see, that you did this thing?” (Gen 20:10b). Rather than basing his actions on something he observed in Abimelech and his people, Abraham reveals that he’d acted this way because he thought, “There is no fear of God at all in this place” (Gen 20:11b).
For all of Abraham’s experiences in walking with the Lord, in this situation he was clearly in the wrong. He made two fateful errors that led to his confrontation with Abimelech.
He prejudged Abimelech, thinking that because he had a different god, he would not fear the God of Israel, nor could he be guided by him. And, beyond that, he assumed that based on these factors he would be treated poorly, perhaps killed.
He failed to account for God’s sovereignty in this situation—his power to speak to whomever he wishes, his ability to display his will and his power whenever he sees fit, and his agency in choosing who he works through. As God says to Abimelech: “It was I who kept you from sinning against me” (Gen 20:6b).
In the end, not only did Abimelech fear the Lord, he also treated Abraham abundantly well: “Then Abimelech took sheep and oxen, and male servants and female servants, and gave them to Abraham, and returned Sarah his wife to him” (Gen 20:14). He gave Abraham one thousand pieces of silver, and said, “Behold, my land is before you; dwell where it pleases you” (Gen 20:15b).
The world today is full of people eager to say who is holy and who is profane. However, the Tanakh and the Brit Hadashah are full of wisdom about how we ourselves might be holy, and avoid the profane. A story about the Apostle Paul illustrates this distinction and offers some parallels to Abraham’s experience.
In Acts 17, Paul finds himself in Athens, waiting to be joined by his companions Silas and Timothy. Like Abraham, he frequently sojourned in strange places, among people who did not worship the God of Israel. When Paul sees that the city of Athens is filled with idols, he is spurred to action. Having previously been beaten and imprisoned in other stops on his journey, he is now without his traveling companions, and among strangers engaged in unfamiliar worship. What would any of us do in this type of situation? Paul has every reason to proceed suspiciously, and approach things from a place of judgment, but here is what he does instead:
First, he quickly converses with them. He finds they are curious about what he has to say (Acts 17:18–20).
Second, he does not condemn their ways, but speaks to them with due regard, appealing to their conception of divinity as a starting point for revealing to them what he knows of God’s nature (Acts 17: 22–25), even going so far as to respectfully quote their own philosophers back to them to make his point (Acts 17:27–28).
Third, he holds nothing of himself back from them. No deception. No tricks. He simply gives them the information they need in order to make an informed decision.
Paul perhaps had even more reason to be distrustful of the Athenians than Abraham had to fear Abimelech and the people of Gerar, for he had suffered much physical pain for the gospel on his journey, and then found himself alone in yet another strange place. But, in contrast with Abraham, Paul accepts the welcome the Athenians give him, makes no presumptions about their understanding of God and their ability to hear from him, and allows ample space for God to act as a sovereign agent in the situation. (Which he does, for we see in verse 33 that some among their number came to believe in Yeshua, and they joined Paul.)
Our world is perhaps more divided today than it has ever been. This division is seen not just in our country, but in our communities, our congregations, and even within our own families. As believers in Yeshua, it is right that we should seek to always stand on God’s side in all situations, and work toward the fulfillment of his purposes. But when we encounter people we presume to be far from God, we might do well to remember the lessons of Abraham and Abimelech, and the wisdom of Paul among the Athenians.
“Every way of a man is right in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the heart.” (Prov 21:2)
All Scripture references are from the English Standard Version (ESV).